Donnybrook Theatre

WWE 24/7 ("Classics on Demand") added a never-before-seen snippet entitled "Donnybrook Theatre". A pilot episode from 1995, hosted by Todd Pettengill, with Mr. Fuji, Yokozuna, Lord Alfred Hayes (he was still around in 1995?!!) and (apparently) the Rosati Sisters ("Oink-ettes").

Like the bastard love child of "TNT", it took place in a studio, with an Old West Saloon set-up. Recalling "Fuji Bandito", Yokozuna and Fuj walked in to play cards. Might sound like fun... but 95% of the skit was Todd Pettengill motor-mouthing his way through the whole thing, while dressed like the old "movie director" stereotype. Clad in a beret, boots and carrying a megaphone, Pettengill narrated the whole thing, which was completely devoid of humor or excitement. Stuff like: "Yokozuna then sat down to play cards!"

For some reason, "The Huckster" soon entered, although he was announced as simply "Hulk Hogan". Yoko slowly beat him up and gave him the BANZAI drop. That was it... as the final segment was destroyed and couldn't be found. Very, very WEIRD. The premise sounded somewhat funny, with Yoko and Fuj clowning around, but Pettengill delivered no witty remarks or one-liners and the "director" gimmick quickly turned stale. Then "Hulk Hogan"?! I'm curious as to WHEN this was originally filmed, as it may have been their first attempt to whip up something similar to the Billionaire Ted skits.

Avoid this clip at all costs. "Fuji Vice" has gained a cult following over the years, but it "Donnybrook Theatre" ever does, then there is no hope for the Internet Rasslin' Fan.

WWF @ Madison Square Garden - July 12, 1986

I wanted to review this entire card, but time constraints and the weekly WWE Classics OnDemand expiration meant I had to record it while I cut the grass. Still, got to see the gist of the card, including:

Tony Atlas vs. Leaping Lanny Poffo
Face-v-face match and actually not 100% terrible, as Atlas was much more mobile than I expected. Before the match, Lanny delivered a light-hearted poem praising "Mr. USA" and bemoaning his lost luggage. Both guys traded dropkicks to pick up the pace, but Atlas soon settled on the chinlock. Ending was unexpected, as they bounced off opposite turnbuckles, with Atlas leap-frogging and pinning Poffo with a backslide. A bit sloppy and choregraphed on the pinfall, though (you could see Poffo "stumbling" and putting his arms into position for Atlas's backslide).

22-Man $50,000 Battle Royal
Somewhat famous match-- it's the "match where Jimmy Hart hides under the ring and eventually wins". Mostly jobbers and tag-teamers, with Johnny Valiant and Bobby Heenan also donning the trunks. Going off of memory, but I think it included:

1. Big John Studd
   
2. King Kong Bundy
   
3. Bobby Heenan
   
4. "Handsome" Harley Race
   
5. Greg Valentine
   
6. Brutus Beefcake
   
7. Tony Garea
   
8. Lanny Poffo (still sweating from the last match)
   
9. Tony Atlas (same as above)
   
10. Sivi Afi (listed as "Siva Afi")
    
11. Junkyard Dog
    
12. Moondog Spot (listed as "Spot Moondog")
    
13. Moondog Rex (listed as "Rex Moondog")
    
14. Billy Jack Haynes
    
15. King Tonga
    
16. Pedro Morales
    
17. Dynamite Kid
    
18. Davey Boy Smith
    
19. "Luscious" Johnny Valiant
    
20. Jimmy Hart
    
21. "Iron" Mike Sharpe (yarrrrrrgh!)
    
22. S.D. Jones
    

Cool touch as each particpant was introduced by Howard Finkel, complete with their hometowns. Everyone ganged up to dump Studd and Bundy, about 10 seconds into the match. Camera worked sucked, as they missed 90% of the eliminations, instead focusing on Jimmy Hart peeking out from under the ring apron. Best spot had the Bulldogs do-si-do and deliver dropkicks to eliminate the Moondogs.

Final segment boiled down to Haynes, Poffo, Smith, JYD and Tonga taking on Valentine. Valentine casually dumped Haynes, Smith, Poffo and Tonga, leaving only JYD. JYD was thrown through the second rope and discovered Jimmy Hart under the ring. Hart was brought back in to act as cheerleader for Valentine. Had to wonder WHY Hart was in there, since exactly ZERO of his clients were enrolled in this thing! Still, Valentine showed some hold-over loyalty to his old manager and protected him. Both JYD and Valentine tumbled over the ropes, simultaneously, leaving Hart as the victor. Hmm... have to check the records (including Memphis), but this may have been Hart's in-Ring Career Highlight.

Junkyard Dog vs. Greg "The Hammer" Valentine
Match went forever (remember: "it takes the Hammer 30 minutes just to get warmed up"), until both guys continued their Mild Battle Royal Feud and fought to a double-countout. Finkel again delivered some good theater as he announced both guys names, slowly, after the match, building suspense until it was deemed a "double countout".

Cage Match: Tito Santana and Bruno Sammartino vs. "Adorable" Adrian Adonis and "Macho Man" Randy Savage
The old chain-link cage and not the "big blue bar" version. Chico and Macho's collective presence was understandable, but I think Adonis/Sammartino was set up by a few "Flower Shop" segments. Rather funny how the #2 and #3 heels in the company (Macho and Adonis) had to sell for Bruno's punches and running knees. Bruno won it by beating the crap out of both guys, then exiting through the door. For good measure, Chico went over the top of the cage, at the same time. Bruno sure seemed to work a LOT of cage matches in 1986 and most were pretty well received by the crowds...so you have to give the old guy credit!

Other matches I didn't watch included:
Pedro Morales pinned "Iron" Mike Sharpe

Tag Titles: British Bulldogs beat the Moondogs

Billy Jack Haynes over Brutus Beefcake by DQ

King Kong Bundy & "The Giant" John Studd beat King Tonga & Sivi Afi

Harley Race pinned Tony Garea

Glad I got to cut the grass, as this card turned out to be over 2 hours of SUCK. I would've liked to catch Tonga/Avi vs. Studd/Bundy since I've become a big Tonga/Haku/MENG fan ever since I got WWE 24/7 and I've always dug Bundy. A few promos for next month's show aired; including Heenan declaring that Andre would be exposed under his "Machine" mask. But overall, this show was rather awful.

Boba Fett. Still Sucks.

As a public service for "Star Wars Day" (May the Fourth be with you...get it?! Nyuk! Nyuk!), I need to announce how much Boba Fett sucks, once again.

Worthless guy who looks kinda' neat... but his claim to fame was floating in garbage, then requiring the help of no less than Darth Vader and a buncha' Stormtroopers to catch some guy, along with his girlfriend, his dog, and a gay robot. Not to mention he also needed the help of (and betrayal by) his target's old gambling buddy.

Fittingly, to complete his life of worthless suckitude, Boba Fett was accidentally killed by a blind guy.

Iron Man: Animated Armored Adventures in Armor that are Adventurous

Ol' Tony Stark has been rebooted and re-labeled a lot, recently. Obviously, the most successful was the 2008 big-screen movie, but we've also had re-boots in the comic books and the 2007 Direct-to-DVD animated release.

So now Nickleodeon has launched "Iron Man: Armored Adventures". Done in the computer-animated style of MTV's ill-fated "Spider-Man" cartoon, it recasts Tony Stark as a 16 year old wiz kid. James Rhodes, Obadiah Stane and Pepper Potts are all along, as well. Following in the tradition of Stupid Marvel Super-Hero Theme Songs, this new show has its own entry.

For a "kids' show", some of the themes are pretty dramatic. Example: in the first episode Howard Stark dies in a weird plane crash and Tony soon has his familiar electrically-powered heart battery.

But it seems more than a little tough to stomach Tony Stark as a 16 year old (recall "Avengers: Timeslide" and the 1995 Kang/Iron Man/Mantis quagmire). Some Marvel heroes can be re-worked as teens, but Iron Man works best as an adult in his 30's (at least). Batman is the same. Besides, it gives something us old codgers can relate to. After all, we're the ones with disposable income who are buying the eventual DVD sets and other junk (although fathers say they're buying it "for their son").

Anyways, "Iron Man: Armored Adventures" runs on ...umm..I think it's Nickolodeon (might be "NickToons") on primetime Friday nights. Episodes are being added to Comcast's "onDemand" feature, as well.

Comics (in)Fest

Denver had an event called "ComicsFest", last weekend and it was a little bit of a disappointment. Located across the street from a concurrent Sci-Fi fest, it was basically some vendors and a few c-level "creators". I steered clear of the Sci-Fi fest, but of course a few of them wandered over (even some dork in a Klingon costume).

"ComicsFest" was set in a room about the size of the average garage, with room for one person to walk down each aisle. It was very hard to look through each vendor's comics. Especially when everyone was wearing a winter parka..and some with giant backpacks. I sorta' felt like I was suffocating.

Outside the room, they had the "creators" crammed in a hallway. Again, ONE person could pass through. The only name I recognized was Mike Baron, and he was selling autographed trade paperbacks of his stuff. A buncha' zombie and vampire artists, too. Including some chick who was the "star" of a direct-to-DVD feature called "Zombiez in my Colon" or some crap. Uh huh...I'm sure her clothes stay on through the entire film.

The admittance fee was WAY overpriced and the staff was worthless. I was stupid and actually asked to pay for an admittance wristband. Nobody checked wristbands and I could've walked right in and saved myself ten bucks. The guy who took my money was all sorts of stupid. He didn't explain what I was paying for, I had to ask him for the freebies (all of TWO folded/stapled pamphlets), where the main room was, and if I could have a bag.

I spent 17 bucks and got 48 comics. Mostly the random cheesy junk that I like. Although I went to one dork and sifted through his 50 cent box... I picked up a recent "justice league of america" so I could have some more hate-fodder. The guy immediately jumped on me and said "If you want an autographed version of that, we've got one! Cuz' we MET Brad Meltzer!!!" The man had waited his whole life to brag about that worthless fact.

BFD...I've met Sgt. Slaughter, ya' schmuck. I don't get the whole fanboy "We've got autographed comics" deal. I mean, if I have an issue of Amazing Spider-Man, I want it autographed by Spider-Man. Since that's impossible, I don't want my comic signed by someone who is NOT Spider-Man. That's like getting the production man at Topps Baseball to sign an Albert Pujols baseball card. Although my buddy and I did find a Superman book that was "autographed" by Clark Kent.

Better organization and a larger venue and this "ComicFest" could be something worthwhile. All the money they spent on getting shitty vampire artists could've been applied to organization and a better facility. The fan-base is there, but the organizers are apparently uber-cheap and went with the cheapest ballroom they could score. On the positive side--at least it wasn't a Super 8. Not everybody can be San Diego Comic-Con, but even when that was starting out, it was located in a fairly sizable downtown hotel.

Shorties: Ricky Steamboat & Shane Douglas vs. Big Sky & Vinnie Vegas

Keeping with WWE 24/7's March theme of "Large and in Charge" (aka: "fat guys"), this match is currently airing under "Shorties". It's from WCW Saturday Night on March 6, 1993. Douglas and Steamboat are the reigning WCW World Tag Team Champions, while Vegas (everyone's pal, Kevin Nash) and Sky (everyone's favorite Sabretooth from "X-men") are two random tall dudes teamed together.

While it's good for variety, you have to wonder if they could've dusted off something a little more interesting. The entire match features Vegas and Sky just pounding on Douglas. Douglas eventually escapes by performing three of the most awkward somersaults I've seen. Usually, this spot works well for the babyfaces: they quickly somersault under the heels and make the Hot Tag. But Vegas and Sky are both out of position and have to WALK OVER to Douglas, then make a concentrated effort to stop and STEP OVER him.

You'd think Douglas' escape would lead to a comeback win for the champs. Vegas and Sky were nothing exciting, so a clean loss wouldn't have hurt them. But, the Hollywood Blondes team of Brian Pillman and Steve Austin knock Douglas off the top turnbuckle and cause the DQ. Steamboat eventually chases them both back to the locker with a steel chair.

Like I said, it's good for variety, but not much else. Jesse Ventura and Tony Schiavone are on the sticks, though. They're not bad at all, yet Jesse gets in an amusing comment that causes Tony to lose it. Jesse is talking about the "the two big boys in the ring, Sky and Vegas. And speaking of two big boys-- howabout that Missy Hyatt?" It takes Tony a few seconds to piece it together... but then he laughs as he gets the punchline.

Twotter

I can never figure out the popularity of some crap. Hell, it's been almost 18 years and I'm still mystified why Kurt Cobain and Nirvana became popular. The latest trend that I can't grasp is Twitter.

Hate Twitter. The Padres/Mariners game had their field correspondent "twittering", last night (it was simulcast through MLB Network). After the game I checked out her twittering feed, since she was kind of a cute broad. But it was completely worthless gibberish, like "8th inning. Did you see that play? Hope to get interview".

A few months ago, the late lamented Rocky Mountain News sent a reporter to Twitter the funeral of a 3 year old boy killed in an accident. Pushed the limits of taste, but in included such insightful crap like: "10:33 am- dirt is thrown onto coffin".

I kinda' hate Twitter because it's dumbing down "journalism" and bringing Internet "sites" down to the lowest common level. Most Twitter feeds have poor spelling, awful grammar (stuff like: "your hot" or "it would of been a good idea") and halfway-formed random thoughts. The basic gimmick is that Twitter doesn't want you to think before posting something. It's the latest way to archive verbal diarrhea on the Internets.

Mid-Atlantic Championship Wrestling - 11/25/81

Tuned in for my second consecutive installment of Mid-Atlantic. It was pretty much the same as the first. Modern fans like to bitch about how current program can run for 30 minutes without showing an actual match....well, this episode went up to 20 minutes before showing a match. When they did show a match, it was another remote Tommy Rich jobber squash. Followed immediately by more remote footage of Angelo Mosca. In fact, it may have been the exact same Mosca match from the previous episode.

This reminded me of how repetitive pre-1990 shows used to be. You'd go for WEEKS, seeing the same replays, interviews and run-ins from previous shows.

But one match featured Blackjack Mulligan and Jake Roberts vs. Charlie Fulton and Nikolai Volkoff. The cameras completely missed Mulligan finishing off Fulton, as they zoomed in on Jake drop-kicking Nikolai out to the floor. Funny thing, but Nikolai was wearing his old USSR skullcap-- or swimmer's cap-- or flight helmet, for the entire match.

Most of the focus of the first half of the show was on the upcoming 1982 Cadillac Tournament, with Sgt. Slaughter and Roddy Piper chiming in, again. Mulligan even said he'd be interested... after all, Sally Mae and everyone back at the ranch in Texas were in hard times and they needed something to help pay the mortgage. Some of the old blue-collar themes that made old rasslers so popular.

The second half seemed to focus on the ongoing Roddy Piper/Ricky Steamboat issue. But overall, it was to drive fans to an upcoming houseshow in Charlotte, which would feature Steamboat and Roberts teaming up to face Piper and Ole Anderson.

There was also a "Pvt. Jim Nelson" squash worked in. Where Nelson was very much a protege of Slaughter. Nelson was much more mobile and active than the stompy/kicky lump he became as "Boris Zhukov". For instance, he started off with a quick waistlock into an underhook pinning combo.

Noticeably absent from the show were Jay Youngblood and Wahoo McDaniel. Slaughter seemed to tie-up his issue with Wahoo, saying how it was over because Wahoo never answered his challenge. Not sure of the details, but it made it seem like Wahoo had left the area, at least temporarily.

Ric Flair cut a promo for the Charlotte show, pumping his bout against Ray Stevens. Flair threw in a warning to Ole Anderson. Just seemed weird to hear Flair at odds with one of the original Horsemen.

I wasn't into this episode, too much, but I like how they're airing them in chronological order. The main crop of Slaughter, Piper, Ole, Steamboat, Roberts and Mulligan (both Jr and Sr) is excellent.

Farewell to Space Battleship Galactica

I wasn't a hardcore fan and didn't discover it until the third season, but "Battlestar Galactica" ended on a satisfactory note for me. Big ol' battle and no plot threads left dangling. Although, I kept thinking we would be given a final swerve and a "Planet of the Apes Ending".

For example, when they showed Bill Adama sitting on top of the field, then cut to little Hera... I thought she'd stumble over something buried in the ground. Something that had evidence of current 21st century techology (I dunno..maybe a cellphone, circuit board or a VW symbol). So instead of being in Earth's past, as we were led to believe, they were really in the future.. after mankind had destroyed itself once again.

But that would be SUCH a dark ending. I'm glad it ended how it did: on a hopeful and happy note. Also tied into the original series' intent, of how they were supposedly the Egyptian "gods" and/or started life as we know it on "Earth".

Nice touch how they played the theme music from the original series as Sam Anders flew the fleet into the sun. I think that was the first time they paid homage to the old music since the very first episode.

I can see how there could be disappointment over not explaining Starbuck's return. I was okay with it, but I'm curious why that Leoben Cylon guy wasn't seen. I was expecting some explanation of why he was so fascinated with her. Or why he freaked out and ran when they discovered Starbuck's corpse on the burned-out "Earth", earlier this season. After that scene, he essentially evaporated from the show. I didn't really care for the character, but after giving him such prominence in Season Three, I expected more from him in the end.

Oh..and "Chief" Galen Tyrol say he'd be on a island, somewhere far north, away from people? My guess is that Tyrol (who was known to be pretty handy and could command a work force) gave birth to the legend of Santa Claus!

There was a mix of spirituality in the ending, of course, as mentioned in the final scene with Virtual Baltar and Caprica. I'm pretty much an atheist and I didn't have any faults with it. I don't think there's a definitive answer to spirituality...and that's probably the point. What is the "higher power" that humanity likes to define as a creator? There is no definition of it, it's up to us to decide how to grasp it. We might try to define it, but we never really define it. Sure, that's ambiguous, but it makes sense to me.

Think about it in the content of Baltar's speech in the CIC. When he said something how "God is a force of nature. But good and evil are things that we define". So the message I got is that there's something out there...but it's open to our interpretation.

I know they're supposed to produce spin-offs and other crap, but I couldn't care less. Yet I'd be totally on-board for a spin-off show of Bill Adama and Saul Tigh sitting on a couch and shootin' the shit. Those two codgers MADE the entire series for me. Old Guys Rock and I'm now okay with getting old, gray, wrinkly, fat and even losing an eyeball. Every time I burn my Pillsbury Toaster Strudel, I always mutter in my best Saul Tigh voice: "mmm...frakkin' toaster!".

So thanks for 2.5 years of fun, SciFi Channel (I started watching in Fall 2006). You can now keep airing ECW, Ghost Hunters, House of Frankenstein and other Stuff That I'll Never Watch.

Oh--and if you missed the finale, I'm sure you can hit Hulu. Or, if you have Comcast's OnDemand, it's available there as well. It's hidden under "The Cutting Edge" category. Then select "SciFi" and you should see a listing of the last 4 or 5 episodes. Very handy thing and the way I got into the series in the first place.

Language Crutches

Just as the 90's had "Don't Go There" and "That's What She Said", we now have two new over-used supposedly witty and trendy cliches, both completely devoid of relevance and humor. I'm talking about:

"Yeah, especially in this economy"

-and-

"I'm That Guy"

Both have a few variant editions floating around. For example, there's "even in this economy" for #1. But the pertinent element is that it always has "in this economy".

#2 has quite a few versions, as well. Like: "I never wanted to be the guy who leaves at 9 and goes home to sleep. But, yeah, I'm now That Guy". Or, "The one who shoots her mouth off, I don't want to be That Girl".

Radio adverts use 'em. Newscasters use 'em. Shitty Bloggers on the Internets use 'em. You could create a running game on how many times you hear similar phrases during the day. First one to 100 wins a Kick to the Groin.

So clean up your vocab and, please, do NOT use these cliched crutches. Cuz' you don't want to be That Guy, especially in this economy.

Watchmen: Special Lights and Music Edition

After countless reprintings of the "Watchmen" Trade Paperback, it's nice that DC and Warner have teamed up for yet another version; one that's easily viewable on a giant movie screen, has music, and requires no reading!

If you liked the Watchmen comics...errrr, graphic novel, then you'll probably like the movie. If you didn't like it.. well you can probably figure out that version of the equation, Pythagoras.

The final ending was tweaked a bit, but it actually works well and feels more...symmetrical. The comic book's giant alien squid seemed out-of-left field to me. The new cinematic ending ties things together a bit more.

Also, I'm sure a lot of geeks will consciously or subconsciously cream themselves after seeing THE ultimate fanboy fantasy scene: banging a hot chick in your heromobile while she keeps her skin-tight black vinyl boots on. The whole thing only works if she keeps the boots on. It was an okay scene, until it included the stupid "joke" of switching on the flamethrower to simulate a climax. I heard a lot of audible groans in the theater at that point.

The "Watchmen" movie is similar to the Lord of the Rings movies in it's nature. Just as many scenes in those movies were meticulously translated from the Tolkien books, the same effect is in play, here. Even the bruises on Rorschach unmasked face seemed to be identical to their original printed inspirations. So if you ever want to read "Watchmen" again, just save yourself some time and see the movie. Pretty much the same thing, only you'll get some music.

World Baseball Big Bacon Classic

Maybe it's an embedded meme in my brain, but the term "World Baseball Classic" always makes me think of the dearly departed Wendy's Big Bacon Classic Value Meal #4. Man, I miss that thing. $4.59 of pure artery-hardening bliss! They should bring that combo back for the duration of the World Baseball Classic; just slap a WBC logo on the french fry box and I'd have a pants-creaming lunch break.

But I've been checking out a few World Baseball Classic games on the new MLB Network. Just like 3 years ago, it appears that MLB is once again airing their own version of the NFL's Pro Bowl-- a worthless exhibition with no relevance. No offense to the exuberant fans in Puerto Rico, but we don't seem to care about the thing. Especially when Sidney Ponson is leading the charge for a WBC team. Yet I do like the name of "Sharlon Schoop" on the Netherlands team. He plays shortstop, but with that surname he'd be better as a first baseman.


It's also a little peculiar to me how the USA team was seeded in a relatively weak bracket. Perhaps making up for the US's embarrassing belly-flop in the tourney, back in 2006? Without doing much research into the brackets and rosters, the avergae baseball fan could assume, in any tournament, that Puerto Rico, USA, Japan and Cuba would make the finals. So far, that seems to be the course.

While it might be a novelty to see rainbow-colored uniforms and weird exhibition games every 3 years, the WBC has a ways to go before it gains any relevance. If there was a way to take the previous season's four NLCS and ALCS teams into the tourney, that'd be interesting. Scheduling (late October) and/or off-season roster shuffling would make that impossible, though.

But at least the quality of play in the WBC is better than the "Carribean Series". MLB Network aired that thing, last month. After years of thinking it was something special, I tuned in to see dropped pop-flies, misplayed balls and weak at-bats.

A primer on Triumph and Tomorrow Woman

A budyd emailed me asking about DC's Triumph and Tomorrow Woman, both of whom have apparently been featured in the current "Trinity" series. So, not one to waste a decent email, I thought I'd share with the class:

1-- Triumph was created around 1994 and he's sorta' like Marvel "Sentry". He was rectonned to be an early member of the JLA...but he was wiped out of existence and completely forgotten. He was "lost in time" or some weird crap. He came back in the mid-90's and was a good guy for a bit. He even joined the JL:America or Justice League Extreme. He disappeared from DC around 1996 due to Lack of Interest. He came back again in 1999/2000 in "JLA" and had been brainwashed by an evil imp (Q'xl or whatever..an old Aquaman villain, sorta' like Mxyptylk) to be a bad guy of sorts. But he ended up becoming good, again, but soon fell victim to Lack of Interest. He was also used, recently, in "Brave and the Bold" and had apparently had a son.

2-- Tomorrow Woman was created for a JLA one-shot, circa 1998 as a new member of the JLA. She became a member, but it turned out she was just a robotic spy from Professor Ivo and T.O. Morrow. But she rebelled against her programming and "died" a hero (sorta' like Wonder Man in "Avengers", way back in 1965).

Nightwing finally gets "killed"!

I haven't been paying much attention to DC lately, yet I wasn't surprised when I picked up Nightwing #153 in my hold box, last week, and saw the tagline: "FINAL ISSUE" on it. The book's been a downhill train without direction for the last 100 issues or so. I was always amazed that "Azrael" got to 100 and I'm disappointed that in 153 issues, "Nightwing" actually out-sucked "Azrael".

What started out as a satellite Bat-title soon became a completely unnecessary title, period. The first 24 issues or so set up Nightwing's Bludhaven as a Triple A Gotham City, yet not without it's own unique appeal. Writer Chuck Dixon established a quirky little corner for Nightwing; a character who had mooched off of others for almost 60 years (namely, Batman and the Teen Titans), finally had his own mythology and realm.

Nightwing was originally sent to Bludhaven to pursue remnants of Black Mask's "False Face Society", but soon ran into Electrocutioner, Two-Face, Scarecrow, Brutale, Lady Vic, Stallion and others. All capped off by the obligatory "master villain": Roland Desmond the Blockbuster. After being enhanced by DC's 1995 crossover "Underworld: Unleashed", Blockbuster had become a super-powered Kingpin of sorts. And it worked. Mix in the corrupt Bludhaven PD, including Dudley Soames and things got really interesting.

Soames soon became one of the most gruesome villains in comics history: "Torque"...basically a guy who had had his head twisted around 180 degrees...and survived! With his head screwed around, Torque was in the vein of guys like Two-Face. Soames eventually ran into "Nite-Wing", a violent, overzealous dorkbag who wanted to become a superhero.

That got us to issue 25 or so. It was around that time that Dixon ran out of ideas. Soames and Nite-Wing seemed to almost take over the title, with their constant inclusion. A short interlude involving the retconned villain Shrike (hey, now THERE'S a character DC seriously needs to work with) was the only reprieve. For well over 100 issues, "Nightwing" lingered.

Around issue 120 or so, DC wanted to kill off the character of Nightwing. But fans revolted and the execution was passed over. DC re-launched Nightwing two or three times since with new directions for the book. All of which stunk and made Archie Superhero Comics seem like works of art.

The latest was a hack named Peter Tomasi who included lame dialogue that seemed to be copied from Wikipedia. Such as a master villain explaining how a woman's uterus produces a baby (really). He also worked in some of the shittest one-liners since a Lorenzo Lamas movie. Example: a water tower ruptured, sending water spewing below. Nightwing's "witty" remark was: "I guess the Beach Boys are in town". Ugh. In a later issue, when Nightwing was fighting some of Ra's Al Ghul's flunkies, he drove over them with a Batmobile and said: "welcome to Bowling for Ninjas".

Beach Boys and Bowling for Dollars references. Pretty sure those haven't been relevant since the early 70's. Not to mention that they weren't funny then, either.

So now Nightwing (the title) is being axed. Frustrating because the character of Master Dick/Nightwing has been extremely popular among fans for decades. Yet nothing of substance occurred in 153 issues of his long-awaited title. Now the character is being shuffled off DC's current "Battle for the Cowl of Batman" stuff.

He's right back to where he started: mooching off of others.

Mid-Atlantic Championship Wrestling - 11/18/81

No idea why this randomly popped up on WWE 24/7, but I'm glad it did. From late 1981, it doesn't feature great matches, but a lot of good ol' fashioned angle-development fun.

Matches/interviews of note:

Jay Youngblood vs. Tony Harris
Pretty sure Harris was a young Black Bart. He was allowed to get a fair amount of offense in, but in the end Youngblood made the Spinach Comeback, chopped him and got the pin.

Special Interview with Sgt. Slaughter
Sarge introduced tape from the previous week, when Wahoo McDaniel complained about Sarge ducking him. Sarge was pissed, offered to put his US belt on the line against Wahoo, then ran to the ring and demolished a jobber. All the while, yelling for Wahoo. Also of note: Sarge was accompanied by "Pvt. Nelson", a young Boris Zhukov.

Special Interview with Roddy Piper
Claimed he was the baddest dude in MACW, etc. He showed a past clip, where he ran into Ricky Steamboat's match and dropped him with a blindside elbow.

Special Look at Tommy Rich
Taped from a different promotion, as Rich pinned a jobber. Bob Caudle and Sandy Scott were excited about new talent coming into MACW and wondered how to get more. Which segued into...

Special Interview with Sandy Scott
Scott's plan: offer a new $17,000 1982 Cadillac to attract new talent! They planned to give it away, somehow, be it in a battle royale or a tournament. This brought out the unofficial heel alliance of Ole Anderson, Roddy Piper and Sgt. Slaughter. They all expressed interest in the Cadillac, with Piper saying he'd sell his Grandma to the Huns for $17,000. Sarge also offered to wrestle his mother. This led into...

Special look at Angelo Mosca
Footage from the WWF of "King Kong Mosca" and his manager Lou Albano beating up a jobber. Scott then said how cool it would be to have Ole, Piper, Sarge and Mosca all in the ring at once, competing for a Cadillac.

Special Interview with Jay Youngblood,Ricky Steamboat and Jake Roberts
Steamboat contradicted Piper's early claim...then showed the rest of the match and how he rebounded from Piper's attack to win the match. Also kinda' funny how Jake Roberts was wearing a cowboy hat and playing up his Texas heritage.

Ricky Steamboat & Jake Roberts vs. Super Destroyer and the Grappler
Like a lot of folks, I remember Steamboat and Roberts and blood enemies from the WWF in 1986...so it's weird to see them as partners. Everyone went toe-to-toe with basic 'rasslin until Ole, Piper and Sarge all invaded the ring area. Super-D and Grappler were then DQ'd and the babyfaces cleared the ring. No idea who this Super-D was, but he was wearing blue n' gold. Pretty sure Grappler was the real deal of Len Denton.

Also, interspersed throughout the show were local promos for an upcoming card. Fun stuff, as we got to see Jimmy Valiant, Blackjack Mulligan, Jr. (Barry Windham) and an odd tag-team pairing of Jay Youngblood and Ray Stevens.

Overall, the show had a great cast of characters and some vintage old-school angles. 24/7 has been tossing up some random episodes of territorial promotions for the past few months, and these have been somewhat of a treat.

Crisis on Earth-Selig!

Bud Selig Might Reinstate Hank Aaron as Home Run King

Look, Hank Aaron is an American icon and all, but resetting the records isn't a good idea or a "fix-all" to MLB's steroid mess. It's like a dead beat, cheating, abusive dad thinking he's clear just because he got an anullment.

The inflated records are-- for better or worse-- baseball's stigma. It has to live with them, as penance for ignoring the problem. While suspicions of steroids have existed since the 80's, Bud Selig was more concerned about fixing that awful problem of a tie in the All-Star Game.

You can't wipe it clean and get a fresh start. You made your bed, now lie in it.

But someone could argue: "well, that devalues the purity of the game and nobody will ever be able to break these records". However, you could also argue that having these tainted records could possibly inspire future players to work harder and do it "the right way". I know... such an outlandish idea.

Besides, let's say you DO set about erasing all steroid homeruns from the record books. Using Bonds as an example, you'd have to go back and wipe out all of his offensive numbers.

Well, what if those numbers actually helped win a game or inflated someone's ERA unfairly? Okay...let's adjust those too.

Well, whattabout standings? I mean, Barry Bonds' homeruns, when mapped out, helped the Giants win an additional 10 games in the 2002 season (total estimate, just for the sake of argument). Well, the Dodgers finished 3.5 games behind the Giants in the Wildcard race, that year. Umm...shouldn't the Dodgers retroactively be cited as the Wildcard winner, now (or eventual NL Champ)?

Whattabout that pitcher whose ERA was unfairly inflated by a McGwire, Palmeiro or Bonds? Hmm, checking stats, he might've won the Cy Young that year. He could call his agent and sue someone for grievances and an unfair working condition. "Due to steroids, my client was unable to attain substantial financial compensation for his efforts".

In short, it could be a statistician's nightmare to simply "erase" any numbers.

Once again, MLB and Bud Selig made this mess. They'll have to live with it. We, as fans, had to live with it..and we can't go back and give ourselves a lobotomy to pretend we didn't follow or cheer for these 'roid clowns. This is reality-- not DC Comics-- you can't simply white-out what you don't like with a "Crisis retcon".

WWF Prime Time Wrestling- Jan 12, 1988

Caught this on WWE 24/7, last night. I don't have total recall of every little segment, but here's the gist of it:

Bret "Hitman" Hart vs. Paul Roma (w/Jim Powers)
Joined in progress, right after the bell. Which leads me to believe that this match was taped when the Hart Foundation were still tag champs and that Hitman had a belt with him. It was probably a "roadblock match", from around the time the Young Stallions "stole" the Harts' supposed theme song of "Crank it Up". Also a little funny that while Powers is seconding Roma, Jim "the Anvil" Neidhart is nowhere to be found. Anyways, Hitman dominates about 75% of the match, although Roma gets in some minor offense, including his nice flying forearm/fist drop from the corner. Roma makes a comeback, but it's quickly killed when Hitman catches him in a backbreaker, then flies off the second rope with a diving elbow to get the pin. Wow, the Stallions were made out to be complete pussies in this match-- Hart had no trouble dealing with both of them (Powers tried to get involved once or twice) and easily wiped the mat with Roma.

Ultimate Warrior vs. Steve Lombardi
Pretty much an early squash for Warrior, although Lombardi controls for a bit. Stragely enough, Warrior also comes out to "Crank it Up". Nick Bockwinkel and Gorilla Monsoon call the action, as they mention Lombardi was a "graduate of the Terry Garvin School of Self-Defense" and how he patterned himself after Garvin and Pat Patterson. Ick. Bockwinkel then keeps taking points off of Garvin and Patterson as the match proceeds. Warrior blasts Lombardi with a powerslam off the ropes, then stops the cover, so he can gorilla-press-slam him and pin him with one foot.

Back in the studio, Gorilla and Bobby Heenan take more shots at Lombardi. Brain asks: "why didn't he pull Warrior's hair when he was up in that gorilla-press?" Gorilla answers: "well, he was in a compromising position at that point". Brain fires right with: "shyeah! He's been in a lot of compromising positions!" Yow...that works on both a kayfabe and behind-the-scenes level!

KoKo B. Ware vs. "Iron" Mike Sharpe
Sharpe, on his neverending quest for redemption fails once again as he can't make it over the "S.D. Jones Hump" and pin anybody about that level. When asked for comment, Sharpe said: "Yaaaaaaaaaa!" Koko wins convincingly with the Ghostbuster piledriver/suplex.

WWF Update with Craig DeGeorge
A recap of the recent dog-napping of the British Bulldogs' mascot, the lovable Matilda, by the dastardly Islanders. WWF Pres Jack Tunney declares the Islanders suspended without pay, until Matilda is returned.

Highlights of Hulk Hogan vs. King Kong Bundy from SNME
From the January 3, 1988 SNME, where Hogan finished off Bundy. A rematch from the November 1987 SNME, when Bundy beat Hogan by countout. Essentially, this match ended Bundy's first WWF tour, which lasted for about 3 years. But the big shenanigans occur after the match, as Andre the Giant entered the ring and choked out Hogan. Strike Force, the British Bulldogs and Jake Roberts can't break Andre's grip on the Hulkster! "Hacksaw" Jim Duggan finally breaks it up with his 2x4, but it also appears that Andre was simply done, for now.

A Very Special DeGeorge Podium Interview with Ted DiBiase (w/Virgil)
DiBiase isn't used to not getting what he wants. Even though Hogan turned down his offer to buy the WWF Championship, DiBiase has hired someone who will give the title to him: Andre the Giant! Back in the studio, Gorilla chides Heenan for selling out and abandoning his dream of someday managing the champion. Heenan doesn't care, as he's satisfied with simply having a championship manager's payday. Gorilla warns him that all the money will go back if Andre doesn't beat Hogan. Hmm...don't think that point will ever brought up, again.

"Leaping" Lanny Poffo vs. Danny Spivey
Joined in the progress of a BEARHUG, which instantly tells me to hit the head or get a snack. Spivey wins with a reverse neckbreaker (think: "Rude Awakening") after Poffo misses a drop-kick

A Very Special "Mean" Gene Okerlund Interview with Ricky "The Dragon" Steamboat
Gene plugs the "Rumble Royale", then brings in Steamboat, who will be squaring off against "Ravishing" Rick Rude at the event. Steamboat says he's been sitting at home the past six months, but now he's back and ready to make a mark. Ehh....according to who you want to believe, Steamer worked a good chunk of matches from June to December 1987, he was just off of TV.

Heenan blasts Okerlund for calling the "Royal Rumble" the "Rumble Royale". He also refers to Steamboat as "Mr. Mom". They plug the upcoming FREE event some more and name the participants in the Rumble. Bam Bam Bigelow is announced, but he'll end up skipping the match. I'm wondering who replaced him... maybe Tito Santana? They also mention that the Rumble will feature a "face-to-face confrontation" between Andre and Hogan. Yet they don't mention the upcoming "MAIN EVENT".

Cowboy Lang vs. Lord Littlebrook
MIDGET MATCH from Paris, France. Lang actually comes out to "Crank it Up", as well! Littlebrook: "ayyy-yi-yi-yi-yi-yiiii!" Since it's a midget match, we get the obligatory butt-bite. Littlebrook finally wins by hooking the tights. This match was given TWO whole segments....but, as Heenan might say, it still came up short.

Brady Boone & Billy Jack Haynes vs. Demolition (w/Mr. Fuji)
Boone's filling in for the injured Ken Patera. Lots of pounding, although Boone and Haynes work pretty well as a team. Smash gets the pin with his "stun-gun" top-rope drop on Boone. Funny point, but there's no ringcrew, so Demolition has to carry their own masks, chaps and jackets back to the locker with them. Like Bundy, I think this was the end of Haynes' WWF tour.

Well folks, that wraps it up for this edition...

"Youngblood" Set to Sell 8 Movie Tickets

Sad, but true... someone is looking at developing the 1992 pile known as "Youngblood" into a movie. Complete with shoulderpads, catcher's masks, poofy hair and tiny ankles:

Youngblood movie at Variety.com

What cracks me up is how the report calls it "an iconic graphic novel".

And I'll officially lose all hope for you guys if someone comments: "Yes! This will rule!!"

All Hope.